Archive Page 2

Now

27Mar09

train-passing-by

The present is the singularity where personal potential turns into memories.
-M. Wade Nichols


na, vi

26Mar09

30 days, alcohol & pills.

30-days

Changes I’ve noticed.

  1. I don’t wake up shaking any more.
  2. My memory is a lot better.
  3. I’m thinking more clearly.
  4. I enjoy the little things again.
  5. I’m testing my blood sugar (diabetes) 4 times a day, instead of 10 to 20.
  6. I’m getting more things done.

breakandenter

Click image to enlarge.

From A Softer World.


shadow-puppet


Wow. Wow. Wow.


Julie was looking for the David After Dentist video, that depicts a young boy after being doped up for dental work, when she found this remix…

Love it.


This is a very geeky, but great, video on the benefits of fungi.

Mycologist Paul Stamets lists 6 ways the mycelium fungus can help save the universe: cleaning polluted soil, making insecticides, treating smallpox and even flu…

ant-and-fungus

A delicate dance between dinner and death.


antfungus

The mycelium is consumed by the ants. They become mummified and BOING, a mushroom pops out of their head.

It’s worth your time if you can spare 17 minutes and 44 seconds.


Warmth

24Mar09
1023

This is not my photograph & I don't remember where I got it from.


aa, v

24Mar09

Fifth meeting. I ended up sharing the life approach that Chaz wrote about in Winning at Loser’s Games.

I seek to win Loser’s Games by simply not showing up.

-Chaz

Quotes from tonight were as follows…

I’ve got to carry the message, not the mess.

I had a hard time during my recovery when family members accused me of drinking, when I wasn’t. Their lack of faith in me made it hard for me to have faith in myself.

During rehab we had a saying. HALT. Never let yourself be Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired.

Freewill is expensive. I paid for it so many times in the past. I need that structure, I need rules.

Where else are you gonna get this kind of help… for a buck? (referencing the collection tray).

Tis all.


millersharpeneonI bought a Miller Sharp’s today (non-alcoholic) to go with my sandwich and as I walked out of the grocery store, I wondered, “What would people at A.A. think?” Not that it’d affect my personal opinion on it, but I wondered about their take on it. I don’t think I’d ever bring up the topic at a meeting, seeing as how everyone has their own temptations and boundaries and I don’t want to feel like I’m adding to a problem. However, for me, it’s fine.

Much like coffee, I acquired an appreciation for the taste of beer and like to pair it with certain foods from time to time. Drinking one doesn’t make me wish I had a real beer, it just satisfies the mild craving I have from time to time.

Since I have anonymous people coming through here from my alcoholics anonymous tags, I’d like to go back to my original question. What are your thoughts on non-alcoholic beer? Is it a permanent no-no or something you feel is up to the individual? If you were around a fellow A.A. member at a party or home, would it bother you?


I received an email with 62 photos for a video project I’m working on. Instead of the images being an attachment, I got them as inline images. There’s not a button or an obvious option to get all the inline images, so you have to right-click each one and save them individually. That’s just way too time consuming. I came up with the following as a solution.

gmail-inline-images

1. Open the email and right-click within the body of the message.

2. Choose Save Page As…

3. Choose Webpage (Complete)

4. Save it to a location on your hard drive.

From there, go to the location you saved it to and click through the folders to find your images. They should be in a data folder.


A friend and I were talking about how it was weird to see each other online during the daytime. We’ve been chatting during the wee hours of the morning because we’re both nocturnal like that. So when he signed off today and said, “The early bird gets the worm,” I had to counter with something relevant to us. “Not if the late night bird is still up.” A Google image search later, I came across this amazing photograph.

Click image to biggify.

Click image to biggify.


Click image to biggify.

Click image to biggify.


Table for 1

23Mar09

2009-03-22-cooking

I added The Catmonsters to my comics links on the righ-side menu (scroll up/down if you don’t see them). I’ve been updating and adding a lot to those sections (blogs, comics, entertainment) lately. Make sure to check them out.


infoporn-nuclear-explosions-since-19451

Click image to enlarge.


aa, iv

23Mar09

I went to my fourth meeting Sunday night. On the way there I told the friend that I go with, “It’s been a week now and I’ve missed a total of 3 days. Missing one day, I’m fine. Two days in a row though, feels like too long. Not that I start craving a drink or anything, I just look forward to going now.” He laughed and agreed.

I ended up sharing about my wreck from January 2006.

My name is Wade, I’m an alcoholic & addict. (In unison, “Hi Wade.”) I have blood stains on my pants from a wreck, three years ago. I was down in Florida, on my way to a friend’s house, when I rolled my SUV. I walked out my windshield and waited for the cops. I was never charged with anything, never hurt anyone- only myself and not enough to go to a hospital. However, possibly killing myself wasn’t enough. It wouldn’t be until three years later, when I was faced with losing those who I love, and possibly endangering their lives, that it finally clicked for me.

I guess what I’m trying to say is that we all have different motivations. For me, my life wasn’t one, it was losing those that I love. So whatever it is, find your motivation and focus on it.

That’s all I have to say.

Pictures from my wreck.


The quotes that stuck with me from Sunday night’s meeting, are as follows…

“Don’t let your highs get too high, or your lows too low.”

“With alcohol, I could be at a party, drinking with a house full of people and feel completely alone. Without alcohol, I can be at home, by myself, and not feel alone at all.”

“When I was drunk, I’d apologize, but it didn’t mean anything. Sober, I can say I’m sorry and actually remember what I’m sorry for.”


I found this picture of a gorilla fighting a Newfoundland dog. Wow, they’re aggressive creatures.

Newfoundlands are Scary & Dangerous

Newfoundlands are Scary


No no no

22Mar09

I don’t mind her telling me no, as long as she’s cute when doing it.

no-no-no


Bumper Wisdom

22Mar09

During our outing today, we were behind a truck with some bumper stickers that made us laugh. Keep in mind, we’re in the heart of the Bible belt, where the idiocy of Glen Beck & Rush Limbaugh are praised, so not only are such bumper stickers appreciated, they give us hope :)

Click image to biggify.

Click image to biggify.


Jules and I visited the library today. I got a few books and found a documentary called, “World’s Most Dangerous Drug” about Meth in the United States. While it covers the ins and outs of the drug, the movie also weaves the story of a couple (Michael & Janelle) into it that is just sad. That aside, an interesting segment was regarding its (ab)use in Asia, which surprised me.

I found it online for those interested.

I can’t say I’m surprised by how widespread its (ab)use is today. Personally, I have a few friends who use to cook it and have a few people from my childhood who’ve abused it.


Well worth the build-up.


Oddly entrancing. Not sure what else to say.

More about Boxxy @ Encyclopedia Dramatica.


How to turn $5,000 into $15,920 in less than 5 minutes… in chips, not money.

Take out two players with a higher full house. Check.

Dealer: Hand #11235290025
Dealer: dion_sae shows [9d 9h]
Dealer: packphour shows [Tc Jh]
Dealer: oupi06 shows a full house, Sevens full of Jacks
Dealer: packphour shows a full house, Jacks full of Tens
Dealer: packphour wins the side pot (4,320) with a full
house, Jacks full of Tens

Dealer: dion_sae shows two pair, Jacks and Nines
Dealer: packphour wins the main pot (6,270) with a full
house, Jacks full of Tens


Play the top pair. Check.

Dealer: Hand #11235297320
Dealer: cooee1 shows [7s Ks]
Dealer: packphour shows [As Ts]
Dealer: cooee1 shows a pair of Kings
Dealer: packphour shows two pair, Aces and Tens
Dealer: packphour wins the pot (4,780) with two pair, Aces
and Tens


Do it with nothing. Check.

Dealer: Hand #11235302018
Dealer: cooee1 shows King Jack high
Dealer: packphour shows Ace King high
Dealer: packphour wins the pot (300) with Ace King high


Capitalize on technical difficulties. Check.

Dealer: Hand #11235306816
Dealer: cooee1 has 15 seconds left to act
Dealer: cooee1 has 15 seconds left to act
Dealer: cooee1 has timed out
Dealer: packphour wins the pot (225)


Let them win one so they stick around. Check.

Dealer: Hand #11235314579
Dealer: packphour shows a pair of Tens
Dealer: Egde602 shows a pair of Aces
Dealer: Egde602 wins the pot (250) with a pair of Aces

Push before the flop. Check.

Dealer: Hand #11235317838
Dealer: packphour wins the pot (150)

Tripling it is nothing. Last night I took $1,000 up to $95,000+ in just under 3 hours.

Anyone want to front me some money?


5. Homey D. Clown from “In Living Color

4. Karen from “Will & Grace

3. Six from “Blossom

2. Sophia & Rose from “Golden Girls

1. Al Bundy from “Married With Children

*This list is subjective & in no way official or definitive.
I reserve the right to let you retain your own opinion.
You're welcome.

Posted on Craigslist tonight. Want it?

http://lexington.craigslist.org/msg/1083252071.html

Click image to read the details.

Click image to read the details.


na, iii

19Mar09

dsc00915

Three meetings in five days. This time it was a N.A. meeting, which includes drugs and alcohol. Since I was also on prescribed drugs, it makes more sense for me to attend those, though both types of meetings have been great. Unlike my A.A. meetings, I actually shared at this one. My words rushed and shaky, but at least I shared this time.

My name is Wade, I’m an addict. (In unison “Hi, Wade.”) I’m just happy to see through the prescription bullshit. My medications came from a doctor and since they came from an authority figure, I took what they prescribed with a sort of blind faith. Besides, “They are legal,” I’d remind myself- which added to the blind faith. It’s that blind faith that gets us into trouble. We have to evaluate who we are and how such things affect us, things that doctors, friends or family don’t always see. Like [girl's name] shared earlier, the motive of those trying to help doesn’t always have our best interest at heart, or doesn’t help in the way that works for us as individuals. We have to put that blind faith aside and actively figure out what works for us- and then do it. That’s all for now. Thank you. (In unison, “Thanks, Wade.”)

wades-ladder

Wade's Ladder

Others went on to share. Below are some of the quotes, from tonight, that stuck with me.

One pill is too many and a thousand isn’t enough.

Recently, I’ve been trying to stop my three year old son from sleeping with mommy and daddy. He came in our room last night, so I made him a palette on the floor next to us, as a sort of compromise. After a few minutes he got up and asked,
“Daddy? Daddy?”
“What son?”
“Can I sleep up there with you? I won’t pee, I promise.”
Well, I folded right there. So he got up in the bed, snuggled in and looked at me and said,
“This is perfect.”
It’s moments like that, that I would have missed out on in the past because I was either drunk or high. I don’t want to wake up one day, him be 14, and not have memories like that to look back on. That’s what keeps me clean.

I don’t put a fraction of the effort into these meetings, that I did into trying to get my dope, but somehow it’s a hundred times more rewarding.

In closing, I may need to seek out a C.A. (caffeine anonymous) group because of these meetings. Four cups of coffee tonight. Yum :)


A map of the world, based on population.

little-boxes


spider-in-dollarEmergency Economic Stabilization Act of 2008, Federal Reserve, Money as Debt, David Rockefeller, Bilderberg Group, International Monetary Fund, Earmarks, New World Order, Nationalizing Banks, Obama & Bernanke, Lobbying, Subprime Mortgage Crisis, Alan Greenspan, Fiat Currency, 2000s Energy Crisis, North American Free Trade Agreement and countless international finance news stories, have all led me to this quote…

I believe that banking institutions are more dangerous to our liberties than standing armies. If the American people ever allow private banks to control the issue of their currency, first by inflation, then by deflation, the banks and corporations that will grow up around [the banks] will deprive the people of all property until their children wake-up homeless on the continent their fathers conquered. The issuing power should be taken from the banks and restored to the people, to whom it properly belongs.
Thomas Jefferson,
3rd president of US (1743 – 1826)

spidey-740899Each link above is part of a web that is made of telescoping webs, complicating its predecessor. If we wish to be the spider, instead of the fly, we must walk the spun silk we trust and Charlottize our beliefs in the battering winds of economic change.


kazbor-restSince moving to Kentucky the thing we probably miss most from Florida is… the cuisine. Memories of India (navratan korma), Amura Sushi Bar (rolls royce roll), Austin Cafe (pita & humus), Panera Bread (broccoli & cheese soup), The Cheesecake Factory (thai chicken pasta), Kobe Steakhouse (chicken teriyaki), Buca di Beppo (sweaty salad), Cariera’s (grilled chicken ziti), Carrabba’s (bread & dipping oil), and on and on and on…


Low-budget music video that pays off. The story goes…

December 2007: Rushing to make a due date for a USC Music Video class, I ask my friends Raf and Abby to appear in my video. I like the way they bounce off of each other despite completely different personality types, and think they both have interesting faces. Raf didn’t want to shave so I didn’t push him. We shot in one night, I cut overnight, turn it in and call it the worst thing I’ve done so far.

January 2008: On a whim one night while visiting home in Austin, Texas, I throw the video on Youtube just for kicks.

April 2008: Ray Tintori, who has directed 3 official videos for MGMT, finds my fan video online and invites myself and my two actors to come to New York to appear in MGMTs next official video for Electric Feel.

May 2008: We go to New York and have a great time on the set with the band and all their friends.

Enjoy.


(Thanks to Theo for the link.)